gotta get that new new

So this is the new year
And I have no resolutions
For self assigned penance
For problems with easy solutions

2010 is upon us, and i for one am inspired to start anew. new goals, new experiences, new perspective, new me.... well rejuvenated me. i will strive to draw closer to the person The Lord would like me to be, and closer the person i know that i can be. elbow grease will be required... i have so many great ideas, and i think that i'm ready to finally start making them happen. i have dreams that i would like to see realized. lets hope that i will.

i look back at 2009 as a time of growth. i would not be so confident about myself in 2010 otherwise. ya maybe i didn't do as much as i would have liked, and ya there's some things that i still need to work on, but i feel as though i'm finally ready to do those things- to be a better person, a better friend, a better student. to be better to people and to be better to myself. i don't think i give myself enough credit, and that has a lot to do with my self doubt, and my negative self image. but i think that as i grow, those will both slowly disappear. how can i do anything that i want to do with those things hanging over my head?

i know that the Lord has so much in store for me, and i know that i can be worthy of those things. more elbow grease will be needed, but i can do it. i'm like that little engine that could. i think i can, i think i can, i think i can... you know?

i'm excited to see how school goes. i'm taking all these boring classes, like economics, and marketing, and yet i could not be more excited for them. i know that its what i need to be doing, and i'm finally ready to do it... i guess i just needed to finally realize it.

bumbumbum.... that was a little tune while i think about what to say haha

uh... i've got nothing else, as its 4:41 and i'm not firing on all cylinders at the moment. so i'll leave you with my blessings to you all- may the Lord bless you in everything that you do, and may you keep Him in mind as you go about your days. i know that we focus on living like Christ a lot during this time of year, but i challenge you all to live by His example throughout the year, and throughout your life. it is something i'm working towards, and honestly, it would just make the world such a greater place if everyone lived like that. i know religion isn't for everyone, but so much good can come from living by the principles taught within the scriptures. so do it, even if you don't want to. you'll find yourself slowly wanting to, as time goes on, and you'll find that you're leading a much happier life.

so i leave this year behind, and welcome the new year and a bright future with all of you. there's a sun shining, and i can feel it's rays.

God bless this mess.

school is cool

School is cool. So cool in fact that I went ahead and signed up for it again. 15 hours of it every week even!

I'll be taking:
Acting III
Play Reading
Principles of Macroeconomics
Health & Wellness
Principles of Management
and U.S. SOC & CULT SN 1877...

Not sure what that last one is though... I'm blogging this on my phone so my connection to the internet is limited... However it should be a great semester. Lots of learning and junk.

I went to Duffy's tonight to do stand-up, and it went okay. I was nervous so I was talking fast, but some of my jokes hit, so that was a plus. I managed to tell a poop joke. And let's be honest, poop jokes are always funny. My face got super warm, and some girl hooted at me, and I flirted on stage with her, but I couldn't see what she looked like... She was short and large and not pretty and drunk...

Needless to say this is where I tell you I'm shallow and only flirt with girls I think won't like me. Its more fun that way. Hahaha I jest... But really though, she was not a pretty sight haha. That sounds horrible, but I'm horrible so I don't care.

I wore my glasses today. I also slept in a stranger's bed last night. Haha those two things did not go together at all... That's what is called a 'nonseguator' (not sure on the spelling though... Basically you segue from one topic to another with a completely different subject... And there's your english lesson for the day.

There was a dude that made poop jokes and jokes about how overweight he was for his whole set. I did not like it. It was a nice lesson in what not to do. No one will like you if you don't like yourself. Too philosophical? I think so...

Anyway I have no idea where this blog is heading but I want to end with a poem. However I will not... I have no patience on this little phone to come up with a ditty for you.

So will bid you farewell for now, and let you know how special you are to me. Keep up the good work.

"Sorry about my dad... He likes to show off sometimes" -Jesus (on why God created the earth)

when it rains it pours

and i'm done pouring.

So long, farewell, auf Wiedersehen, good night.
I'm glad to go, I cannot tell a lie.


done wasting my time.
period.

blind

i can't see. i don't have my contacts in, and i can't find my glasses, but that's 100% beside the point.

i'm blind to every wave i make in my tiny pond, and how they affect the people around me.

my room is clean, and that's nice.

so there's that i suppose...

i need a haircut. and a new pair of shoes. gravis preferably.

i want to make a short film, but i need it to snow first.

i found my glasses! success!

that is all. end of blog. life is blah.

nothing has changed

life is still living, and i still have hair on my head. new music has been discovered, and old music has faded into the background. friendships have grown, or shrunk. or disappeared completely. such is life.

i have a sinus infection. the doctor gave me antibiotics and steroids. i feel like i should be a big muscle guy, but they're apparently a different kind of steroid. i'm still not sure what to believe. maybe i'll get roid rage and punch some people.

i was messing around with stage makeup today, and at one point my face was purple. no pictures to document this event though. dang.

this weekend was entertaining. i saw reckless at wesleyan, and it was amazing. 'life has been reckless with these people' i want to make art that well.

sometimes i feel like its us that are reckless with ourselves, not life. we are the variable. life is a constant.

what else? um... my parents were gone to Colorado Springs this weekend, and they're being vague about their activities. i hope they didn't kill anyone. i have no idea how i would deal with that news. probably poorly.

i slept in their bed while they were gone. very comfortable. i could sleep in it every night, if at all possible. maybe i'll steal their bed when i move out.

i'm listening to Gregory and the Hawk, a very deceptive band name. it is just one person. a girl. there is no one named Greg, and there is no bird. at all. however her music is very pleasant. go check it out. I'd say please, but that wouldn't change your mind as to whether or not you're going to listen to it. it will not push you over that edge between doing it, and not doing it, you know what i mean?

i watched a lot of movies this weekend, as well as the husker game. i'm still a big fan of (and always will be for that matter) well produced films. and i've decided that there's a distinct difference between films and movies. Fight Club is a film. Baby Mama is a movie. make sense? like it really matters anyway. most people don't care enough to make a distinction between things like that. but i'm snoody, so i can do that.

i like all movies. and films. i always find something to like about them. well i just lied again. BTK was the single worst thing i've ever seen in my life. horrible acting. horrible production. horrible dialogue. horrible story line. just disgusting all around. never see it if you don't have to. it should just be erased from time and space.

give me my 90 minutes back from that one, please.

but really i find something to appreciate about almost everything i watch. even the kiddy shows i watch with my niece. there's something there that someone put in because they love what do, and its my mission to find those things in everything. does that make sense? i hope so. i can't be the only person that does this.

the iTunes visualizer blows my mind.

i need a tripod.

the humor in this post was very dry, and i hope that translated well.

my eyes are tired.

look left and look right but never look down. never look down.
thank you justin nozuka


good day to you all.

i want

love.
happiness.
mcdonalds for breakfast.
a couch.
some new books to read.
to meet willy wonka.
a pair of prescription sunglasses.
a new laptop.
understanding.

someone to wake up to.

phone blog

This is a blog from my phone. It probably won't be thàt good but here we go.

I'm in church right now with mandy, and its general conference weekend. Basically we get to hear from our church leadership twice a year- its awesome. Admit it. Elder Bednar is tight. And has funny stories. Haha

I went to Parachute and Secondhand Serenade last night with mandy, and jeff. It was good. However I missed 'We Ain't Plastic' at The Public in lincoln, which is a bummer but I had a better time in omaha. :)

I am happy, and this was subpar, but oh well. I'm sitting by this hot girl, and I'm in church so I appreciate the situation. Haha

Deal.

Later kids.

patience

I have none.
I am the most impatient person I know.
I'm like that girl in Willy Wonka- "I want it, and I want it now!!" And then she goes down the egg chute! Then her dad jumps in after her!
I don't want to end up going down the egg chute!

So that's my problem. I see something I want, and I therefore need it.
There are days when I feel like I'm growing up, and then there are days I feel like I will have the mindset of a 5 year old for my entire life.
Which worries me a little.

I mean not a lot, but a little.

blogcity

i though i'd start a new blog, you know a sort of new beginning and all. since that is the theme of my life lately, but i decided that i liked the name of this one entirely too much to just go and start a new one. i mean lets face it, the title of this blog is possibly the high point of my career. not sure what career that would be -maybe naming things- but whatever it is, this is the apex. so i'll stick with this one. okay?

currently i'm listening to a musical. specifically i'm listening to tick, tick... BOOM! but thats not important. what is important is that i'm listening to something that isn't HAIR. because i love that musical to death, but i was listening to that, and that only. i wasn't even listening to NPR from 4pm to 7pm! it was a serious problem. no longer though.

i feel like life is very amazing right now. refreshing in fact. the Lord seems to be steering me toward a very good place, and for the first time in a while i'm listening to His advice... funny how things work out when you do that, huh? i am thankful for His persistence.

anyway i just wanted to say that i'm very thankful for the people in my life right now, and all the goodness they bring. positivity can be a very powerful tool.

i know this isn't too deep, but i can't really concentrate right now, because of the musical thats playing right now, and my need to sing along with it, but the next one will be really good, i promise. maybe it'll even be hilarious. or witty. or another great descriptive word.

I SAID GOOD DAY SIR!

-robert

take another picture with your click, click, click, camera

name that song and i'll give you a dollar.


soooo.... this happened:
and you will not believe how devastated i am about it. i mean yeah its only the mic, and yeah its fixable, but i honestly don't know what i'll do with myself between now and the time i get it fixed. filming is so much a apart of me, that i don't feel whole without it.
i keep telling myself that i'll be great, because i'll be able to skate more (something i desperately need btw) but at the same time all i can think about is the wasted time spent not filming. its literally on my mind all the time. i'll be hanging out with friends and i'll be thinking of what spots we could be at instead of hanging out. or i try and think of new creative ways to film, to keep the viewer interested. even when i'm sewing its on my mind. or i'll be listening to music, and i'll editing footage in my head, and deciding whether the song that is playing would be good in a video or not. things like that...
i guess over the last however long its been since i picked up a camera its become so much a part of me, that not having the ability to use it is like not having the ability to sing, or see. it means that much to me, and it just bums me out beyond belief.

that's all. i'll let you know when its fixed. have a good'n












the song is "Click Click Click Click" by Bishop Allen

i'd like to take a minute

i'd like to take a minute to be real.
to be serious.
to reflect on where i am in life.

on may 16th, 2009 i should have been wearing a cap and gown. i should have been breathing a sigh of relief that i was finally done with college. i should have gotten a piece of paper saying that i had earned a degree. i should have been doing something. something to say that the last 4 years of my life were well spent, that i had gained a higher level of understanding of life, and of the way things work.
instead i was out filming. skating the day.
do i regret the choices i've made? to an extent. 4 years ago i started school, a bright eyed freshman with a future planned out. i knew where i was heading, and how i wanted to get there. that focus and those dreams slowly became clouded. through life experiences, and life decisions i have ended where i am today: degree-less and on an unclear path.
would i change who i am today? no. would i change where i am? you bet.
while i won't say i don't enjoy the life i live, i know that i have the potential for so much more. i have a great opportunity to do something with my skill sets, and be great. i love the people in my life, and the people who have helped me become the person i am. i appreciate my teachers, and my classmates. my friends (both in the theatre and on the skateboard) mean the world to me. the two groups are like night and day, but i don't know what i'd do without any of them.
to be honest, i'm scared. scared to have the people i've known for 4 years leave, and scared where i will end up, without a degree.
while i love and appreciate skateboarding, for all it has done for me, i'm scared that my focus on it has hindered other aspects of my life. like my acting- another great passion of mine. i can't look toward my future without seeing both pieces, and yet i'm having a harder and harder time seeing how the two pieces fit together.
i know that the Lord has great plans for me, and that when i trust in him i can achieve anything, i just doubt sometimes that all i want to achieve will happen.

i feel like i've cheated myself of an extra step in life. like the people i've gone to school with the past 4 years are leaving me behind. i know its just a really expensive piece of paper, but i want that piece of paper. and to see them all with it, and to not have one of my own hurts. i know i always joked that i didn't even go to school at Wesleyan, but to say it now, and actually mean it, makes me feel like garbage. i never pictured myself without a degree, and yet here i am- out of a school that i hate, and yet hating that i'm not there.

oh the troubles of life.

you know

the more i watch the lakai video, the more i appreciate anthony pappalardo's part:



i also LOVE the 6 cubes piece. it works so well.



i'm up at 5 cutting patterns for jeans, so i don't have to keep using the same one over and over. in like a hour i'll have individual pieces for every size. hooray. i'll be rid of the crappy paper one.

this is my little break, as my back hurts from leaning over a table that is too short. the end.

fridays with jeff

figured i'd throw it up here too. enjoy!

lately

i've been not sleeping a lot more than usual lately, and aside from getting back into reading, i've spent my time watching lots and lots of great movies. probably one of my new favorites is London. its all about people interacting and i love that stuff. actors really get to flex their acting muscles with that crap. because their interactions drive the plot, there's no explosions to move the plot along.

anyway i'll bring myself to my point. watching all these great films really keeps me looking toward the future, where i'll maybe have some opportunities to make great works of art. and as scared as i might be, i'm so looking forward to moving to LA in order to try and achieve these goals.

in the meantime i'll continue to further my craft in ways that i can here, through local venues, and whatnot. also in light of the first paragraph, i want to re-create some of the scenes, and monologues in these great movies i've been watching. one of the great things i love about watching a play is that if i go see a play, i can go buy the script, get the rights, rehearse it, and then perform it. and its your own, you get the experience of seeing someone else's interpretation of it, and then you can make your own. and i love that about live theatre. its one of the things you can't do with any other medium. not television, not movies, nothing.

you especially can't do it with movies. a production company comes in with millions of dollars, and they make a movie, and that's that. no more. maybe in 50 years someone will remake it, but that's it.

so hopefully in the next little while i'll get some people together, and do some art, and record it, and throw it up online.

i think that's about it. i love theatre in all forms, as long as its good. haha but then again you learn from bad theatre too.

watch this:

heeeeeey

its been at least a month since i've blogged, and i felt i owed it to the Internet, so i broke down and decided to write one. i guess its cuz i don't really have anything to blog about. i just go out and skate every day, and uh... sleep and uh... hang out. haha i'm not that interesting. really.

i need a job. and to be motivated in my sewing. those two things are at the top of the list.

i feel like i need to be in a relationship for some reason. maybe its because i'm not an independent person, as lee pointed out the other day. hahaha i'm just a goober, so i don't attract the ladies anymore. haha. lemme know how true that is... pretend you have a paper that says "is robert pretty, and would you date him" (they should be the same answer) and let me know which answer you would pick. hahaha

i shouldn't blog at 2:30 at night. my brain won't make interesting things for me to put in this blog. sorry about that.

anyway. i am wearing glasses, and watching comedy central, and laying in bed. i should be cleaning my room, and sewing, but i'm writing a crappy blog instead. haha

okay i'm done.

today

today just so happens to be my birthday. and i have lots to say since i can say pretty much whatever i want... birthday aside.

well i'm 22 today, and i've been looking forward to it for a while. 22 doesn't happen to a particularly important age, other than letting people know i'm getting slightly older then they are. i just view each birthday as a new beginning. a chance to make this year of my life a little bit better than the last one. a chance to improve upon my weaknesses, and strengthen what is already strong in my life. whether that be personal relationships, or commitments to things, or whatever. just to be a better person.

most people try to make that decision at new years, but i feel like when i do it for my birthday its always a little easier to keep things looking up.

anyway i just wanted to say how grateful i am for the people that surround me, the people in the community, and the people that influence me. i try to stay around positive people, and i try to stay positive around people. negativity gets you nowhere, and a negative environment is destructive to everyone. so i try to put forth that extra effort to be a nice guy, even when i don't want to be. and the more i do it, the easier it gets.

thanks to the people that inspire me. most people inspire me at one time or another. there is one that i'd like to mention today though, because he seems to keep popping up in things that i do, or read, and such. he's Kevin Wilkins. many of you won't know him, but he's the editor at The Skateboard Mag. he lives here in lincoln, which i think is pretty neat. yes i said neat. anyway i absolutely am amazed by his work. he has a piece in (i'm pretty sure) every issue, and every time, without fail, i'm pumped on something after i read it. whether its wanting to get out there and go shred, or maybe its to get out there and take more time to film a trick a little better, or just try and improve my writing, which i'll admit is generally hit or miss. haha what even get me going more, is to be able to send him some of my stuff some day and have him say "i dig it." not that that would be something he'd say. i mean i wouldn't know, i've only talked to him a handful of times, but he might say that. the point is, is that he's out there doing things that inspire me to become a better skate/filmer/writer/person. and that's the sort of things that i love having in my life.

maybe its the accessibility that does it. lets face it, having the editor or a major skate magazine living in your town is pretty tight. but i think its more than that. he's out there doing what he loves, and making the best of the opportunity he's been given, and those are things i want for myself. maybe its all the hype that is constant in the skate industry. every thing and person seems on be on a pedestal these days. there's a rift that seems to be growing between pros and industry heads, and just regular skaters. people are forgetting that pros are just regular skaters too. we're all here because we love it. maybe its because the magazine is the best out there. yeah i said it. the BEST out there. who know what the reason it. if nothing else its because he's an amazing writer. period. and as long as he can inspire, that's all right with me.

idk. anyway... today is my birthday, and its a whole new chapter. a chance to grow. a new sheet of paper on which to write my life story. a new beginning. you get the idea right? haha so i'm off to war- head held high, and guns blazing. i'll become a better writer, or a better filmer, or a better skater, or just a better person. any of which sounds like a great idea. i'd be happy with one, but will plan on them all, because if the last year of my life has taught me anything, its that i can't sell myself short.

so happy birthday to me! huzzah!

wooooow!!!

this is a great skate part!
you can tell he loves 360 flips, but wow! the first minute on the mini is just phenomenal. enjoy


WHO WE ARE // pt. 3 // Josiah Gatlyn from untitled skateboards on Vimeo.

clothes

soooo.... i've been doing lots of research into fashion lately, because i'm costume designing for 12th Night. we're doing it in modern times, but with the original text. but the premise is two opposing fashion houses in new york.
i already love clothes as it is, but all the research has given me so much more of an appreciation for them. they speak volumes about you as a person, and how you view yourself. everyone has their own unique tastes, and their own unique styles. i mean yeah i don't like what everyone wears, or the trends that are going on in the fashion world, but i respect people who have a passion for what they wear.
yeah this is a blog about clothes. haha.
here's my thing; this:

is NEVER okay. why would jumpsuits ever be in style? EVER! i saw them in... i wanna say marie claire and i was like "oh they must be some couture thing" and i brushed it off... then i just saw cameron diaz wearing one on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon, and i wanted to barf. jumpsuits are hideous! now and forever and ever... amen.

well thats all i really had to say.... kind of a shallow blog for the day, but whatever...

um.... go to my new youtube page and subscribe... there aren't any videos up yet... but there will be, and they're going to be great. haha anyway here's the link: www.youtube.com/asiteforsoreeyeballs


-robert

dear life

you rock right now.


i feel like i don't have that much to talk about right now, but i wanted to to blog something. haha. uh... i am at school, and i have to buy a ring at target... and uh... i'm going skating later today, after jazz choir... and i need a new phone... and i have to design costumes for The Last Night At Ballyhoo... and i need chapstick... and i need some lotion for my face... and i want this pair of supras:

they're only $164.... not that bad i think...














-love you all!

you know what's mega tight?

life. haha.

i'm sure you knew thought. i feel like all i do lately is spew happiness. it makes me sick! haha joking!

i'm just really motivated about life and stuff. i'm getting lots done, and i have a lot of things on my plate and i'm not freaking out. i'm just in a good place in life. and i'm only heading to better places, you know? guh i say "you know" a lot lately too.

i'm listening to lots of good music lately too. go check out Way To Normal from the wonderful Ben Folds. its a really good album. in my opinion its much better than his last effort of SuperSunnySpeedGraphic. but that neither here nor there. i've always wanted to say that, and while it didn't completely fit, i thought i'd throw it in there.

saturday was Precision Skateboards' contest at Edge 64, and i had a blast. Cory foster won, and i got some great photos, which i'll be posting up here soon. and then sunday i got to film with the homies for the first time in some months. it was amazing and so much fun. gotta get some new pants to wear as i ripped my favorite pair.


uh.... i think thats it. gotta go practive piano more, which i love. oh! heroes is back... love it.

hope everyone is doing well, and things are wonderful.

love and peace

-robert


also: